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What is it that you hate? If someone had asked me such a question in the past, I would have given them a single answer without hesitation. “That the thing I hate the most is myself”……
I hated my name, which resembled that of an old prime minister. I hated my face, which was neither good nor bad. I hated my timid personality.
I hated my old self to the extent that I wanted to disappear.
I was born as the eldest son of a wealthy family that owned a considerably large company. Perhaps, yes, I was a fortunate man.
I don’t remember being short of money since I was a child, and I could acquire most things I wanted. However, if you ask me if I was happy, that would be something I need to think deeply about.
I had a younger brother who was a year younger than me. I remember that we got along well when we were younger, and did everything together. However, I wonder when did that change?
My father gave my younger brother and I the same kind of education, and often said that he would choose one of us as his successor by the time we came of age.
In other words, my brother and I were competing against each other for the position of successor.
To put it bluntly, it was my brother who was objectively superior to me. The differences between us weren’t really that great. However, my brother was a step ahead of me in every aspect.
Not only was he hardworking, he was also ambitious. He had this shining aura around him, brimming with determination to become the successor. At the very least, I would have lost to my brother with just our feelings about this matter alone.
……However, just after I graduated from junior high, my father announced that he had decided to make me his successor.
The only deciding factor was just “I was the eldest son”. From my father’s point of view, the difference in ability between my brother and I was within the margin of error, and our abilities were very close to each other. That’s why he named me, the eldest son, as his successor.
Even now…… I still can’t forget the look in my brother’s eyes at that time. He seemed to solemnly agree with our father’s words, but I can’t forget the way he looked at me with strong hatred in his eyes…… I can’t forget those eyes that seemed to say “If only I wasn’t here”.
Yes, that’s right, my brother. The excellent one, the hardworking one, the person who truly deserves to be the successor is indeed you. Though it may not be much, you were better than me in every way.
……Just one aspect, that I was born only one year earlier than you, had negated your efforts.
I understood my brother’s thoughts, and I knew that he would be a worthy successor. However, whether it’s declining the succession or facing my brother…… The timid me wasn’t able to do that.
All I wanted was to disappear from this world if I could. If I didn’t exist, my brother would be able to become the successor…… Well, of course, I didn’t have the courage to commit suicide.
Around such a time, I was summoned to another world through a Hero Summoning. I was very confused, but fortunately, I had been educated as the heir to a large company, so I was able to play the role of Hero without a hitch.
Rather, what was more important than that was the choice I was given, between returning to my original world or migrating to this other world after my role was over…… I chose to migrate to this other world.
I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have lingering attachments to my former world, but I still thought that this option was godsent.
……No, I suppose that too might just be an excuse. In the end, I just ran away. I didn’t have the courage to face my brother’s eyes.
My younger brother probably wasn’t ready to give up on the idea of becoming the successor. I didn’t have the courage to compete with him again. I was afraid that one day, I would have the same hatred in my eyes as my brother, and we would hate each other…… Such a thought felt inexplicably terrifying for me.
I chose to emigrate to this world, and politely declining the peerage that they offered me, I set out alone on a journey with no destination in sight.
I was running away from many things, and I didn’t have any goals I wanted to accomplish. I’m just a traveler wandering around.
Thereupon, before I knew it, in this lonesome journey with no idea where I was going, a companion had joined me.
It wasn’t anything dramatic. It was just a woman who happened to be sitting next to me at a bar I stopped by, and we just happened to hit it off, turning this aimless solo trip into an aimless trip for two.
Since then, the number of companions has increased and decreased. There was an eccentric couple who had left the Elven Forest to see the world through their own eyes and traveled aimlessly, an antique dealer who traveled from one place to another in search of antiques that they desperately wanted to acquire, travelers from all walks of life gathered and traveled together.
At the most, I think our group had about 10 people? There were times when we had more and times when we were fewer. Some stopped traveling and returned to their hometowns. There were those who reached their goal and stopped their journey. There were those who made a connection in a town we stopped by and decided to stay there as their home.
My journey was filled with many encounters and partings. Even after getting married, having children, and having those children grow up and leave the nest, I continued my journey.
Why? It’s difficult for me to give an answer to that. I guess it’s just because I still haven’t found “a reason to stop traveling”, something that everyone else who has stopped traveling has found.
When I reached the end of my long, very long journey…… in the countryside in Hydra Kingdom, I suddenly looked back. There, I found my first companion, still accompanying me on my journey…… and currently my wife, with a smile on her face.
When I saw her face, I remembered the 40 years or so that I had traveled with her. It was a journey without any goal in mind…… but it wasn’t as if I had gained nothing.
I believe that the days I have walked gave me definite memories…… and the footprints I have stepped on have shaped who I am today.
Looking back on my past, I, who “had finally been able to stop”, decided to live with my wife in the countryside of Hydra Kingdom as the endpoint of our journey.
As I was relaxing on the porch, drinking tea, I heard footsteps and saw a familiar face.
[Yaa, Shigenobu. I’m here to visit.]
[It’s been a long time, “Rei”.]
[……Oya? Is that right? It should have just been three years, right?]
[My senses really can’t match with you long-lived people. Three years are a long time for me.]
The long-haired blonde Elf…… Rejnhardt is an old friend and a companion I had traveled with for a long time. He is an eccentric Elf who had been traveling with his childhood friend and lover, Sylphia, to walk around the world on their own.
[Did Fia come too?]
[Yeah, she’s right over there.]
Listening carefully, I can hear the sound of my wife’s happy voice, so she must be talking to Fia.
[That aside, hear me out here, my daughter now has a lover. Well, they got together a little over two years ago……]
[Hoohhh…… Your daughter that you dote on so much has a lover huh…… You don’t seem to be unhappy about that though.]
[The guy she’s with is a really good child after all.]
When I saw Rei sitting next to me with a calm expression on his face, I thought about how that free-spirited guy had calmed down so much.
[So, this lover of hers…… He’s actually an otherworlder like you, Shigenobu.]
[One of the people who played the role of Hero huh?]
[No, he didn’t play the role of Hero. Have you heard about how the Hero Summoning had a malfunction last time?]
[I didn’t know…… Did that happen?]
To be honest, I was quite surprised. I mean, is that magic circle really something unstable that could cause an accident? No, it’s not like I’d be able to know the answer to that since Teleportation between worlds is too advanced a matter for me……
[Yes, there were three children who got caught up in the summoning, and one of them is Miyama Kaito, who became Sieg’s lover.]
[Hoohhh…… I’m curious. What’s he like?]
[He’s an amazing child. You might think I’m joking but……]
It had been a long time since I had heard anything about my home world, and I couldn’t help but be interested, so I listened to the story Rei happily told.
I hated the me back then. However…… I don’t hate myself so much now. There are many things I couldn’t do, and there are many things I regret.
Now, I can’t help but think that if I had faced my younger brother instead of running away, I might have had a different future.
However, there are also countless things I have gained. My beloved wife, my children and grandchildren, and my eccentric friends…… At least, I have gained more happy memories than the number of wrinkles on my body.
If that’s the case, I guess my life isn’t all that bad. If fate allows it though, I would like to talk to the child from my home world who became the lover of Rei’s daughter.
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